Comfortable
by SVU-Obsessed
Summary: One-shot Nia fic. What was going through Nikolas' head the day of his wedding to Lydia? Gia, of course. A look back on their relationship.


This is basically a soppy Nia fic. About half of what I have in here is true to the show, half could have happened. No AU's in this story. Yes, it is a songfic, but I promise, not an nooying songfic. The lyrics are kept to a minimum and clearly separated. I promise! Set to John Mayer's "Comfortable" from "Inside Wants Out".  
  
Neither Nikolas or Gia or Lydia are my property (Or Florence, or Lucky or Taggert). Neither is the song. (Sigh). I wish Nikolas and John Mayer were mine.  
  
All feedback is greatly appreciated. =)  
  
* * *  
  
I just remembered that time at the market   
  
You snuck up behind me and jumped on my shopping cart   
  
And drove down aisle 5   
  
You looked behind you and smiled back at me   
  
Crashed into a rack full of magazines   
  
They asked us if we could leave   
  
* * *  
  
It hadn't been romantic. It hadn't been sweet. It hadn't even been legal.  
  
Our relationship had started out as an explosion.  
  
It started when Gia first came to town. She was trying- well, succeeding- at blackmailing Emily. Lucky and I had staked out when she went to pick up the money we had left for her. We had to know what she was doing, and we pounced on her.  
  
The first time I held her, Gia yelled "Rape".  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Our second meeting was just as productive. We were arguing outside of Kelly's. I was bugging her- well, yelling at her, for blackmailing Emily. I asked her why. She opened her mouth to answer, but instead, pulled me towards her and kissed me. I later found out it was becasue Teggert was behind me, and he didnt know she was in town.  
  
I was shocked, and didn't return her kiss at first, but I didn't pull away either. For a mouth as utilized as hers, she had remarkably soft lips. And she kissed the right way. Even though it was intense, the kiss wasn't too hard. She kissed slowly. And not too much tongue.  
  
Okay, so maybe not the latter.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
As badly as it had started, that didn't stop us from further association. I wanted to find out what she knew about Emily, and she wanted money. Eventually, our daily bickering turned into friendly banter, and before I knew it, I was defending her to her mother.  
  
It was at Kelly's. Her mother, Florence, had come down to visit her and Taggert. They were arguing when I came in for a cup of coffee. I only caught bits and pieces while I was waiting, but caught on that this was about her going back to Columbia. I paid for my coffee, and passed by her table on my way out.  
  
"What's keeping you here? None of your friends are here, you don't even have a proper place to live."  
  
Temporary insanity took over, and I found myself over at her table. "She has a place, actually."  
  
She met my gaze with a thankful look. "Well, almost. We still have to get the-"  
  
"Chimneys checked out. There might be some problems with it."  
  
"Right, the chimney. It's on this perfect little cottage. You'd love it."  
  
"Chimneys, huh?" Florence asked, standing up. "I'd like to see this when you've moved in."  
  
"After I get these chimney's checked," she reminded her.  
  
She said a brisk goodbye to Gia, a nod of acknowledgement to me and left.  
  
"These chimney's will give me the perfect excuse not to get this cottage. Like I'd be able to find this place anyways."  
  
"Actually, I may know just the place."  
  
Maybe I didn't have enough craziness. Maybe I decided I need punishment for something. Maybe I had totally lost my mind. Maybe it was pure, dumb luck. Whatever the reason, I quickly found myself inviting Gia to come live with me.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
None, not a single one of my relationships had ever been traditional. Despite growing up as a prince, the girls I was forced to date were modern- either rich brats or fundamentalist feminists. None of those had worked out. The women I chose to date were just as traditional. But none less than Gia.  
  
Our relationship had worked in the complete wrong order. Kissing, then finding out her name. Moving in with her, making love to her, then beginning a relationship with her.  
  
There was no predicting how she would do next. From one obsession to the next, passions changing daily, it all just wanted to make me know her better. I wanted her, all of her. I wanted to know her past, be her present, and stay with her into her future. Her future. My future. Our future.  
  
There quickly became our pattern in our fights. At best, we could go a week without fighting. Usually, we fought daily. Full blown screaming, glass throwing fights. But once our tempers flared, we usually lost interest at fighting, and we usually ended the same way.  
  
Our clothes piled on the floor beside us.  
  
There were fights that lasted longer than an hour, and Gia could hold a grudge with the best of them. It didn't matter that it was my bed in my house that she was throwing me out of, but if she wanted me on the couch, I was on the couch. However, if I was mad at her, either I would sleep on the couch, or she would still sleep, just with her back to me. Sometime after I started dozing off, but before I fell asleep, she would gently press her body against mine, and her gentle kisses and tender touch easily had my foggy mind on something else, coming to full alertness.  
  
* * *  
  
I loved you   
  
Gray sweat pants   
  
No makeup   
  
So perfect  
  
* * *  
  
From the first time we had met, it was clear that Gia was strong, hot-headed, impulsive and independent. This hadn't surprised me when we started living together. What I hadn't expected, that once you peeled through a couple of layers, there was a shy, vulnerable, self-conscious woman.  
  
This hadn't been fully evident to me at first, and it took me a long time to find out. It was one night, during the time when she and Elizabeth were both being considered for the Face of Deception.  
  
I was lying in bed reading while she was in the washroom, doing her nightly routine. What her routine consisted of, I had no idea, and didn't have the courage to ask. It simply meant that if I had to use the washroom, I had to go down the hall because I didn't get to interrupt her. However, that particular night it seemed to be taking longer than usual.  
  
"Everything okay?" I asked, not looking up from my book. There was no answer, but she slowly emerged from the washroom, got under the covers and waited a couple of minutes before she spoke.  
  
"Do you think I'm pretty, Nikolas?"  
  
I gaped at the raven-haired beauty before me and put my book down. Was it a trick question? Did it sound like a trick question? Yes. Could I be sleeping on the couch for a week if I didn't answer correctly? Yes. Would any of what I said or did be used against me in a later fight? Yes. It fit the criteria for a trick question, but her brown eyes bore deeply into mine, anticipation mixed with vulnerability. Her tone had been sincere.  
  
"I think you're gorgeous." Never had truer words been spoken. A knockout in the sweat pants and tank top she was wearing, hair pulled back loosely from her face and not a trace of make-up, I was flabbergasted that she could wonder such a thing. She braced herself up on one elbow and faced me directly.  
  
"The thing is, I don't." Her tone stayed soft, and her eyes faced down. "I mean, I used to when Taggert's friends used to hit on me."  
  
"Taggert's eight years older than you!"  
  
She shrugged. "It was probably more to piss him of than because they were interested in me. At least, that was why I slept with them."  
  
I resisted the urge to fly off the handle and demand who, what, when and where, before finding them and promptly ending their lives.  
  
"It was a joke," she said, a soft smile spreading across her face. "But if I really am pretty, then why don't they want me as the Face of Deception?"  
  
I brought my hand to face and gently pulled back a braid that had fallen out. "If they don't choose you as the Face of Deception, I can guarantee that there will be bigger and better chances for you out there."  
  
"Promise?"  
  
"Promise." And I sealed it with a kiss. She lowered herself down off her elbow to my chest and leaned against it. I switched off the light and put my arm around her. She responded by kissing my neck.  
  
"I love you," she whispered.  
  
I put my other hand to her head and fingered her silky-smooth braids. "I love you too."  
  
* * *  
  
Our love was comfortable  
  
And broken in  
  
* * *   
  
With Gia, very little was simple. But there was one straightforward rule. Forget to tape her soap operas? Fine. Want to watch the game instead of her prime time dramas, forgivable. But nothing, nothing was to mess with her Law & Order.  
  
"Anything good on?" I asked, coming into the living room. Gia was curled up on the couch with a bowl of popcorn. The familiar opening of Law & Order came on. "There must be something better than this crap on." I reached for the remote, and she nearly took my hand off.  
  
"What are you doing?" she shrieked.  
  
Don't get me wrong, I had once been an avid Law & Order fan, but had lost interest after they killed Jill Hennessy off. I took and handful of popcorn and sat at the other end of the couch.  
  
"If this is Law & Order, where's the old Detective?"  
  
"That's the original. This is SVU."  
  
"Don't you mean SUV?"  
  
"Special victims unit. Now hush."  
  
I was going to find something more productive to do, but quickly found myself engrossed in watching. Not the show, but Gia. The way her mouth moved with some of the lines, telltale signs that she had seen the episode before, and the way her eyes glazed over in complete admiration when the court scenes came on. We fell into more of a routine than ever before, every episode becoming a chance for us to just be together. No need for words, so need for anything but each other. It gave us a chance just to be together, and to have her close to me. Her closeness was comforting to me. Our love was comforting to me.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Then there was our engagement.  
  
After a long separation at the hands of my grandmother, we were finally together again. We were living on the yacht, when Taggert and Florence walked in on us in what some would call a "compromising situation".  
  
It was just as romantic and as planned as our first meeting. After we had been given a chance to pull on some clothes, Taggert looked about ready to kill me. He gave me the chance to plea my case.  
  
"Twenty-five words or less," Florence added.  
  
I counted the words off on my fingers. "I love and respect your daughter and would like her hand in marriage. Do we have your blessing?"  
  
* * *  
  
Can't remember what went wrong last September  
  
Though I'm sure you'd remind me if you had to  
  
* * *  
  
After hours of agonizing, days of analysing and over analysing ever one of our conversations, each night we spent together, I still couldn't figure out just where we had gone wrong.  
  
I'd like to say it was my uncle that started to pull us apart, but the truth was we had started to pull apart before that. We had made it through my grandmother, and my uncle shouldn't have had that effect on me. When she started going back to school, spending less time at home, when I started getting more involved with the my family, we started to pull apart, until we both became people who just lived together and occasionally had sex. There was nothing left. I had become someone else. She had become someone else. The only difference was while she became a better person, I became self-absorbed and jealous. She was the one who finally cut it off.  
  
"My sweet Nikolas," she had said softly after breaking up. Part of me wanted to feel nothing, but all I wanted to do was beg her to stay, promise to change and to love her forever. And if that didn't work, sit down in a corner and cry. But I just swallowed hard and went along with it. That night on the docks, she had declared her love to me one final time, kissed me for the last time, and left me. Cold and alone with a broken heart.  
  
* * *  
  
I sleep with this new girl I'm still getting used to  
  
My friends all agree say she gonna be good for you  
  
They throw me High Fives  
  
* * *  
  
I don't remember the first time I met Lydia. She had told me about it, about when we were eight. All I could remember were her pigtails. She seemed disappointed when I informed her that I couldn't be held accountable for marriage proposals before age eight.  
  
When I first told Lucky about her, he though it was a good idea. Then again, it was before he had officially met her.  
  
"Maybe it's a good idea. Get back out there, get you past Gia."  
  
I shot him a look. I was still sore at the drop of her name. "How am I supposed to be with someone else when I'm still in love with Gia?"  
  
"Just give it a chance. It'll be good for you."  
  
His tone had drastically changed after realizing who she was, but his words still stuck with me. They didn't help.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
I loved Gia and I wanted her back. But I knew she wasn't interested in coming back to me. To us, to our love. Our comfort. Just being together. She didn't want it anymore. When I lost her, I lost my heart. When my uncle pushed me into a relationship with her, I resisted. When she wanted a relationship, I resisted. I foolishly spent a night with her, but ultimately it didn't have any effect on my final decision. When my uncle told me that I had to marry her by the end of the month, I had lost everything. I agreed.  
  
But the moment I stood beside her before the Justice of the Peace, all the time I had spent putting my emotions aside was down the drain. I stood beside her with a lump in my throat, tears dangerously close to forming in my eyes, and a longing for Gia like nothing I had ever experienced before. No matter how hard I tried, I loved Gia, and there was no escaping that.  
  
* * *  
  
I want you back  
  
* * * 


End file.
